she walks beside him, her arms wrapped tightly around the laptop that she clutches to her chest, more to keep herself secure than to hold onto the device. in silence, they walk together, and it's supposed to be comfortable.
supposed to be, she reminds herself, supposed to be like this because we're great friends, and we're used to how this is.
because even if he holds my hands, or touches me lightly on the back, the butterflies i get are all the wrong reactions. when we talk, it's how best friends behave, with the casual but concerned stance, when all i want to do is to reach out and hug him.
because this is how i am, and how he is. it can't be anything more.and i hate it when he tests my waters, seeing how far he can push me.
hate how i have promised myself to be always there for him. even when he doesn't know.
hate how many other boys have flown by, because of him.
hate how many times i've stood on the sidewalk as i smile at each girlfriend he has, knowing from the lips of others that hey,didn't you know, he's got someone new.
suddenly, his hands reach out to her shoulders, and he jokes how tense she seems to be. she smiles and relaxes, returning the friendly gesture. she appreciates this company in the midst of a hectic schedule. especially his company.
she knows this will last her for the whole week.
she also knows that this means nothing, but it will keep her. even though she knows... she knows.
1 comment:
hahaaha... poor you.=P
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